question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
