i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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