i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
