Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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