Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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