He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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