i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
