he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
