Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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