So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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