If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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