everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
