I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
