so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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