I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
