It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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