Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
