Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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