there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
