she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
