there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Randomize
