You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
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