doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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