We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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