Say something about gay babies.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
so let's talk penis.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
