bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Actions speak louder than pants.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
