This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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