Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
