I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
