So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Randomize
