I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
