sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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