Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
