and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize