Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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