Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
