I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I supernannyed him into submission
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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