Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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