i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
