lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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