Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
