Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Your tits are I can't wait for
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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