I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You ruined the universe
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
