Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
