dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
