you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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