That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
