is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Randomize
