If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
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