come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
